MCAs to fly to Italy to see how spaghetti is grown

Sunday, July 13th 2014

As a testament to the benefits of devolution, jetlag has now entered the daily vocabulary of the people’s servants who previously went by the title of councilors.
And the latest county to join the frequent flier miles race is doing so under the guise of diversifying their agricultural base by having the MCAs travel to Italy to get a firsthand look and feel of spaghetti farming.
“We want to know everything about the spaghetti crop,” said one MCA who sought anonymity because he will be travelling with his girlfriend without the knowledge of his wife. He added that they must go for this study tour to investigate the crop.
“The types of soil it thrives in, the wind conditions it can survive in, the amount of rainfall it requires, the preferable altitude, whether it can be grown in greenhouses, what measures need to be put in place to prevent post-harvest losses, that kind of thing, you know,” said the MCA, with a frown of seriousness plastered on his face.

The trip to Italy by the MCAs has been certified as urgent, and authorization for the trip has had to be rushed. “It really has to happen now because this is the planting season for spaghetti in Northern Italy while in the south they are harvesting now,” explained the chairman of the county assembly agriculture committee.
“There is no better time than now to go and see both activities running concurrently. Besides we need to move fast with an opportunity like this. We want to be the first in the region and who knows, maybe our neighboring countries will be exporting from us,” added the MCA, as he shrug up his shoulders.
Busy bodies
The MCAs from the county are convinced that with the consumption of spaghetti increasing locally it is time the country started producing it’s own and hopefully reach a level where it can export the excess.
So while in Italy the MCAs will also be looking to link with suppliers of spaghetti seeds who will be critical before the country can start to produce it’s own.
But confronted by journalists and asked whether he was aware that spaghetti is made rather than grown the agricultural committee chair laughed it off. “It’s the idlers, busy bodies and the opposition in our county spreading such rumours,” he dismissed.
“They said the same thing about yoghurt but now we all know there are cows in New Zealand that produce ready to drink yoghurt... trust me. And that reminds me... after we are back from Italy we should be going to New Zealand!” he swore.
Most luxurious
Besides idlers and the opposition friends of underdevelopment and retrogression are also levelling criticism at the trip claiming that it is unnecessary and that priority should have been given to things like roads, health facilities and schools.
“Some Kenyans have been waiting for these things since independence,” one of the trip organizers said. “They can afford to wait a little longer!”
Another MCA is frustrated that members of the public don’t seem to realize the sacrifices he is making in the service of the people. “All these numerous trips are taking a toll on me, Jetlag, bad airline food, do you know how awful airline food tastes after just a few months of exposure to fine dining These are sacrifices you simpletons wouldn’t understand!” the frustrated MCA said, as he clicked in disgust.
“In the next foreign trip, I will not accept to fly in the most luxurious cabin... the county will have to hire a private jet for us!” concluded the MCA.